My heart goes out to his family
He was like my big brother.
I have known him since 1971
when we became Clunan & Rice Assoc.
I will miss him.
DAD WAS NOT YOUR CONVENTIONAL FATHER WHO CAME HOME FROM WORK AT 5:00 PM, SAT AT THE DINNER TABLE & THEN HELPED US DO OUR HOMEWORK.
INSTEAD, DAD WOULD MEET US AT OUR WEEKLY RESTAURANT FOR DINNER (EITHER AT HILLTOP, KOWLOONS, AUGUSTINE’S, LEANING TOWER OF PIZZA, FANTASIAS, OR TINO’S SUB SHOP) THEN RETURN HOME AND IMMEDIATELY PUT ON HIS PAJAMA BOTTOMS, AN OLD T-SHIRT AND RETREAT TO HIS BEDROOM TO WATCH T.V.
AND ALTHOUGH HE WASN’T YOUR TYPICAL FATHER, HE WAS A DAD THAT WAS ALWAYS THERE WHEN IT MATTERED MOST & WE ALL KNEW THAT IN A CRISIS, DAD WAS THE PERSON TO GO TO!
DAD WOULD ALWAYS KNOW JUST THE RIGHT THING TO SAY, WHAT TO DO, OR WHO TO CALL TO FIX THE PROBLEM. AND SOMEHOW HE ALWAYS MAGICALLY WOULD MAKE THINGS O.K.- EACH & EVERY TIME, RIGHT UP UNTIL THE FINAL MONTH OF HIS LIFE.
DAD WAS THE GUY WHO KNEW HOW TO GET THINGS DONE!!!
WHEN WE WERE KIDS, DAD BUILT A SKATING BY HAND IN OUR BACKYARD SO THAT JOHN COULD PRACTICE HIS HOCKEY SKILLS.
DAD BOUGHT US SKI-DOOS AND WOULD TAKE US UP TO MT. HOOD AND LET US RIP ON OUR OWN- NO HELMETS & NO SEAT BELTS!
DAD BOUGHT EACH OF US OUR FIRST CAR, WHICH THRILLED HIM JUST AS MUCH AS IT THRILLED US!
NANA ONCE SHARED WITH ME THAT ONE TIME WHEN I WAS ABOUT 5 YRS. OLD, MOM & DAD WERE HAVING A DINNER PARTY AND THEY BROUGHT ME TO HER HOUSE SO THAT NANA COULD BABYSIT ME. FOR SOME REASON I ARRIVED AT NANA’S HOUSE WITH A $5 DOLLAR BILL IN MY HAND AND NANA TRIED TO TAKE IT FROM ME, SO I WOULDN’T LOSE IT. HOWEVER, I REFUSED TO TURN THE MONEY OVER TO NANA, SO NANA PICKED ME UP AND THREW ME ACROSS THE ROOM ONTO A CHAIR. I QUICKLY RAN FROM THE CHAIR TO THE PHONE & CALLED DAD (AT HIS DINNER PARTY) CRYING & TOLD HIM WHAT NANA HAD DONE TO ME.
NANA SAID THAT WITHIN 15 MINUTES OF MY CALLING DAD, HE WAS AT HER DOORSTEP TO PICK ME UP AND SAID TO NANA, “ THAT IF SHE EVER DID SOMETHING LIKE AGAIN TO ME, THERE WOULD BE A PROBLEM….”
WHEN JOHN WAS A STUDENT AT DEERFIELD ACADEMY, DAD TOOK US UP ONE WEEKEND TO WATCH JOHN PLAY IN A HOCKEY GAME. AND ALL I REMEMBER FROM THAT TRIP WAS HOW SHOCKED I WAS TO HEAR DAD YELLING TO JOHN, “MOVE YOUR ASS!!!”
WHEN MARY FIRST WENT TO SLEEP AWAY CAMP AS A SMALL CHILD, SHE CALLED DAD UP CRYING & BEGGING TO COME HOME. THAT SAME DAY DAD SENT A PLANE TO PICK MARY UP & BRING HER BACK HOME.
IN TOTAL CONTRAST, WHEN PATRICE WENT TO SLEEP AWAY DAD SAID THAT AS SOON AS PATRICE’S BAGS WERE OUT OF THE CAR, PATRICE WALKED OFF-NEVER LOOKED BACK & NEVER EVEN SAID GOODBYE… DAD SAID THAT HE WAS, “HORRIFIED” THAT PATRICE COULD DO THIS BUT ADMIRED HER ABILITY TO BE SO INDEPENDENT.
JOHN WALKED ON WATER IN DAD’S EYES. DAD USED TO SAY, “JOHN NEVER GAVE ME A DAY OF TROUBLE.” THIS CERTAINLY COULD NOT BE SAID OF PATRICE, MARY, OR I…
WE ALL KNOW THAT DAD LOVED HIS PRIVACY, SO WHEN PATRICE AND THE GIRLS MOVED IN WITH HIM, YOU CAN IMAGINE HOW CHALLENGING THIS MUST HAVE BEEN. DAD ALSO LOVED HIS MORNING BATHROOM ROUTINE AND HE NEVER WANTED TO BE DISTURBED DURING THIS TIME. BEARING THIS IN MIND, ONE DAY DAD CALLED ME TO TELL ME THAT AS HE WAS SITTING ON THE, “HOPPAH” HE REACHED INTO A BASKET FOR A MAGAZINE & INSTEAD PULLED OUT A HALF-EATTEN HAPPY MEAL CHEESEBURGER- WHICH SOMEHOW MYSTERIOUSLY FOUND ITSELF INTO HIS MAGAZINE BASKET.
DAD WAS IN AWE OF ALL OF THE ACADEMIC & PROFESSIONAL SUCCESSES HIS GRANDCHILDREN HAD. HE MOST LOVED HEARING STORIES ABOUT WHAT WAS GOING ON IN THEIR DAILY LIVES. DAD ESPECIALLY APPRECIATED THAT ALL OF THE GRANDCHILDREN WERE, “NOT TOUGH ON THE EYES!”
DAD LIVED LONG ENOUGH TO SEE HIS FIRST GREAT-GRANDSON (LOGAN) BE BORN! THE FIRST THING DAD SAID WHEN HE SAW LOGAN’S PHOTO WAS, “HIS HANDS ARE SO BIG-SO HE IS GOING TO BE A GREAT ATHLETE!” THE NEXT THING DAD SAID WAS, “DID YOU NOTICE THAT LOGAN HAS THE SAME SMIRK AM ME?”
DAD LOVED DRIVING 2 HOURS UP & 2 HOURS BACK IN ONE DAY TO GO TO QUECHEE AND BLUEGATE TO VISIT MOM. HE LOVED TENNIS, RIDING THE WAVES AT HAMPTON BEACH, THE NORTH END MEN’S CLUB, PADDY’S BAR, CAMBRIDGE, HERSHEY KISSES, MR. GOODBARS, EXTRA FATTY PASTRAMI SANDWICHES, RUSSO’S CANDY, ICE WATER IN OVERSIZED PLASTIC CUPS WITH EXTRA ICE CUBES & A STRAW, NICE CARS, OLD T-SHIRTS & WHITE TURTLENECKS, EXPENSIVE HOTEL ROOM SUITES, LONG DRIVES (PREFERABLY ALONE) TALKING ON THE PHONE IN THE CAR, WHILE KEEPING ANOTHER PERSON ON HOLD FOR THE NEXT CONVERSATION.
DAD NEVER LIKED DOWNTIME. HE LIVED EVERY MINUTE OF LIFE TO THE FULLEST. AND OF COURSE, WHEREVER HIS DESTINATION POINT, DAD ALWAYS HAD TO DRIVE THROUGH CAMBRIDGE TO GET THERE EVEN IF IT MEANT DRIVING 10 MILES OUT OF THE WAY!
DAD MAY NOT HAVE BEEN ONE TO SPEND QUANTITY TIME WITH THOSE HE LOVED MOST, BECAUSE THAT JUST WAS NOT HIS WAY. BUT HE LOVED KEEPING HIS FINGER ON THE PULSE OF WHAT WAS GOING ON IN EACH FAMILY MEMBER’S LIFE. OR AS DAD WOULD SAY, “I’M JUST TOUCHING BASE!” DAD ALWAYS-ALWAYS KNEW IN REAL-TIME, WHAT WAS GOING ON IN HIS KIDS/GRANDCHILDREN’S LIVES. AND I KNOW THAT BEING THE PATRIARCH OF THE FAMILY WAS A POSITION HE VALUED MOST AND WANTED HIS FAMILY TO RECOGNIZE HIM AS SUCH!
DAD WAS A FIERCELY LOYAL FATHER, SON, BROTHER, UNCLE, GRANDFATHER, COLLEAGUE & FRIEND.
THERE WAS NO ASK THAT WAS TOO BIG THAT DAD WOULDN’T FOLLOW THROUGH ON FOR FAMILY, A FRIEND, OR A FRIEND OF A FRIEND.
DAD LOVED BRINGING PEOPLE TOGETHER AND SEEING WHAT GOOD COULD COME OUT OF SUCH RELATIONSHIPS.
HE WAS THE CONSUMMATE NETWORKER AND THROUGH HIS NETWORKING HE WAS ABLE TO DO SO MUCH GOOD FOR SO-SO MANY PEOPLE. WHETHER IT WAS DOCTOR REFERRALS, TICKETS TO A GAME, HELPING SOMEONE GET THEIR LOVED ONE INTO A NURSING HOME, OBTAINING GRANT MONEY FOR MEDICAL RESEARCH, AND THE LIST GOES ON AND ON….DAD ALWAYS KNEW SOMEONE, WHO KNEW SOMEONE, WHO COULD GET WHATEVER NEEDED TO BE DONE-DONE! AND TO SAY DAD COULD BE PERSISTENT & PUSHY WOULD BE AN UNDERSTATEMENT. DAD WOULD NEVER GIVE UP UNTIL THE TASK WAS COMPLETED-ALWAYS!
DAD HAD MANY, “DADISMS”! WHICH ANYONE WHO KNEW DAD, WOULD CERTAINLY HAVE HEARD AT ONE TIME OR ANOTHER.
“YOU’VE GOT YOUR HEAD UP YOUR ASS!”
“DON’T LET THE DOOR HIT YOU IN THE ASS ON YOUR WAY OUT!”
“THEY CRUCIFIED JESUS, SO YOU’VE GOT NOTHING TO COMPLAIN ABOUT!”
“YOU CAN’T MAKE THIS STUFF UP, NOBODY WOULD BELIEVE IT!”
“COULD YOU JUST DO THIS ONE THING FOR ME?”
“I WAKE UP, PUT ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER JUST TO MAKE A BUCK!”
“YOU HAVEN’T BEEN HIT WITH AN UGLY STICK!”
“I’VE GOT TO STEAL FROM PETER TO PAY PAUL!”
“IT’S JUST A PIMPLE ON YOUR ASS!”
“DON’T BLOW SMOKE UP MY ASS!”
“YOU’RE MY FAVORITE!”
DURING DAD’S FINAL YEAR, HE OFTEN TOLD ME , “GROWING OLD SUCKS!” WHEN I SAID THAT AS A PARENT HE SHOULD TRY TO INSTILL IN ME SOME POSITIVES ABOUT AGING, HE SAID, “NO, IT JUST SUCKS-DON’T DO IT!”
DAD DIDN’T LIKE PHYSICALLY NOT BEING ABLE TO DO THE THINGS THAT HE USED TO DO. HOWEVER, HE REMAINED SHARP AS A TACK. WAKING EVERY DAY AT 6:00 AM, SHOWERING, HAVING HIS MORNING COFFEE, MAKING HIS MORNING CALLS, AND THEN OFF TO AN APPOINTMENT TO, “TRY TO MAKE A BUCK!”
DAD SAID THAT WITH AGE, YOU THINK ABOUT HOW YOU WOULD HAVE DONE SO MANY THINGS DIFFERENTLY IN YOUR PAST IF YOU KNEW THEN, WHAT YOU KNOW NOW.
HE SPOKE A LOT ABOUT HOW WHEN HE WAS YOUNG, HE DID NOT HAVE THE WISDOM TO KNOW THAT IN THE END, IT IS FAMILY & THE LITTLE THINGS IN LIFE THAT MATTER MOST. THAT SAID, HE STILL LOVED BEAUTIFUL MATERIAL THINGS-LOL!!! DAD REMINISCED SO MUCH ABOUT, “THE GOOD OLD DAYS ON MARMION ROAD!”
DAD SAID TO ME OVER & OVER, “WHEN THAT TIME COMES & I AM NO LONGER HERE AND YOU PEOPLE ARE SITTING AROUND SHOOTING SHIT, I HOPE YOU SAY- HE DID THE BEST HE COULD….”
AND SO NOW I WOULD LIKE TO SAY TO DAD, YOU DID BETTER THAN GOOD, YOU DID GREAT AND WERE THE BEST FATHER/GRANDFATHER WE COULD HAVE ASKED FOR!
FINALLY, AS I LOOK AT EVERYONE HERE TODAY, IT OCCURS TO ME THAT WE ARE DAD’S LEGACY - WHICH IS A TESTAMENT TO HOW SPECIAL A MAN DAD WAS!!!
